It only feels like yesterday that Archie was starting nursery , how would he cope being there two mornings a week? Would they look after him like I do ? What will I do if he cries when I leave ? I will miss him so much ! He soon settled in and got through his 1st year. And now he’s off on his taster day to big school in the morning.
He has 2 weeks left at nursery and then that’s him starting big school after the summer. We went to see the school a few weeks ago and he has never held my hand as tight as he did when we walked through those doors.
I could feel my eyes stinging and I had a lump in my throat , but I couldn’t show him this. Wow Archie how amazing is this! The assembly hall was bigger than his nursery – I could see the look of overwhelm in his eyes.
What’s this room for mummy ? Where is my school ? This is it darling you see big school has loads of different classrooms and you will be in one of those. As we looked around he had so many questions to ask and you could see his little face as he was taking it all in.
Then there is the question he has been asking every day for a couple of weeks – is it summer now mummy ? He knows that at the end of summer he is going to big school. And every morning is it the last day of Meithrin (nursery ) today mummy ? I can tell it’s playing on his mind and he is anticipating this huge life event – my tummy flips every time he asks these questions.
I know he is ready for this , so ready and needs the challenges and new learning experiences and I’m excited for that. But when I look at him all I see is that 6lb 14 baby and those chubby cheeks staring back at me. How have 4 years gone by so quickly ?
We will miss our lazy mornings and chilled afternoons , the fresh air and freedom after nursery and being able to to exactly what we want. Instead we will be dictated by school times and routines. No popping up the mountain for a play or to the park for an afternoon picnic. We will miss those spur of the moment plans and play dates.
And then there are the questions that keep going around my head , so many questions. Will they look after him like his nursery teachers do? Will they help him open his yogurt pot if he struggles ? What if he’s upset will they wipe his tears and tell him it will all be ok? What if another child is mean to him or wont play with him?
As I let go of his little hand and give him one more cuddle and kiss I know my heart will feel heavy like it never has before. I know that things will never be the same that he’s not all mine like he has been these past four years.
He will change and grow up so quickly – he’s no longer a baby , a toddler , a preschooler – he is now a school boy. The time will come when he will not want to give me a kiss and cuddle at the gate , he won’t want to spend every last second with me , he wont get excited telling me about his day – I will no longer be his best friend in the whole world.
Me taking him to the gate and waving goodbye in front of his friends will be a memory. This is why my heart is heavy and hurts so much as I know this is the start of him really growing up and taking those independent steps away from me.
I’m also so excited for him and the new challenges he will take on. He’s going to learn to read , play a new sport , play a musical instrument , learn his times tables , speak fluent Welsh and gain so many fantastic life skills.
Good luck my little star – shine bright always.